I Am Not Your Guru

Three years ago, his life was a mess. He hit rock bottom and knew he needed to change. Then, he ordered five self-help books from the internet.

Now, he's a successful person. He runs his own lifestyle business, puts butter in his coffee, and quotes Nietzsche at parties. And in this groundbreaking how-to success manual, he'll teach you how to be successful just like him.

You'll learn things like:

- The keys to ditching all your loser friends (who have prevented you from being successful to this point)

- Proven strategies for being overly optimistic, if not obnoxious, about how much you enjoy failure

- How to 'win the day' with your morning routine, then lose the afternoon (guaranteed)

- How to chunk down your goals and (literally) eat an elephant- How to craft edgy content with the f*cking f-word in the title